


Lily Evans Doesn't Believe In I Love You

by MischievousMessrs



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Marauders, Marauders' Era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-11 22:57:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16861630
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MischievousMessrs/pseuds/MischievousMessrs
Summary: “Did you hear Lily Evans doesn’t believe in I love yous?”It wasn't exactly a secret. But no one knew why, until she decided to share a bottle of fire whiskey in the astronomy tower with James Potter.





	Lily Evans Doesn't Believe In I Love You

“Did you hear Lily Evans doesn’t believe in I love yous?”

“So like she’s never said it to anyone ever? But her and Calum dated for like 6 months! How can you be with your boyfriend and not tell them you love them. That’s just crazy!”

“Maybe it’s a muggle thing?”

****

It was no secret that Lily Evans didn’t say I love you. It was a well-known fact around Hogwarts. Sure the boys she had dated had told her they loved her, but she never once had she said it back. It was the one thing that caused the majority of her break ups. How do you continue to date someone if they don’t say it back? To most Hogwarts girls the idea was ludicrous, but no one out right questioned it to her face. They weren’t that mental.  James Potter however was not ‘no one’.

“I can’t believe you don’t believe in I love you’s Evans” James said aloud to her as they sat together on the edge of the astronomy tower window.

He nursed a bottle of fire whisky in his hand that the he and the head girl in question had confiscated only an hour or so before. Lily took the bottle from his grasp and tossed back a swig. The amber liquid burning the back of her throat as it went down. She coughed lightly as she passed it back to him, keeping her gaze on the dark deserted grounds toward the edge of the forbidden forest.

“I’ve never said that” Lily commented, pointing a finger at him knowingly.

“Isn’t that kind of the point?” James scoffed making more tentative sips at the fire whiskey. She rolled her eyes at him knowing full well he probably couldn’t see her that well in the dark. He was supposed to be her drinking companion and letting her bitch about her arsehole of an ex-boyfriend.

“It’s not that I don’t believe in love and I love you’s. I just don’t think I loved him. I feel like if I did I would know right?” She offered.

“I suppose you would. I still think the expected thing to do when someone tells you that they love you is to say the same back. I mean clearly you cared about the bloke enough to be shagging him” James shrugged. Lily batted his arm playfully.

“You’re such a prick Potter” She started, she reached for the fire whiskey but he held it out at arm’s length away from her. She huffed in annoyance and he handed it to her reluctantly. “You see that’s the thing Potter. I don’t want to tell someone I love them when I don’t. Especially not because he says it first. I mean really if he loved me that much it wouldn’t matter, he would wait for me to say it when I felt like it, he wouldn’t of split up with me and we wouldn’t have caught him in that broom cupboard with his pants around his ankles on the 5th floor”

She took another heavy swig as James offered her a silent nod of agreement. She wasn’t even that upset about the break up id she was honest. She couldn’t be angry at her ex for jumping on a re-bound, she was more just miffed he couldn’t do it while she wasn’t on prefect patrols. Part of her wondered if he’d done it that way just to spite her. Another played her the scenario that this had been going on a lot longer than since they had split up that morning.

“I still recon you should of let me jinx him. Just a little” James said into the open air. There was a cheerful tone in his voice that told Lily he was joking, but all the same she imagined that given the chance the offer would be genuine.

“I’ll stick to wallowing and confiscated fire whiskey thanks” She responded. James offered her one of his signature smirks. Who’d have thought that pairing them as head boy and girl would cause them to settle their differences and bond as friends. “To be honest I only think he said it in the first place because we’d been going out so long and it was just expected you know. I don’t want someone to tell me they love me just because it’s expected”.

“What do you want Evans?” James questioned. Lily remained silent in thought. No one had ever actually taken the time to ask her what she wanted. Though deep down she knew.

“You’ll think it’s mad” She said quietly. She turned her gaze to the bottle sitting in her lap, she twisted the neck of the bottle in her fingers causing the liquid inside to stir.

“Try me”

“I don’t want someone to tell me they love me because we’ve been dating for ages or because it’s expected. I think that’s why I love you’s don’t mean so much to me. They’re just thrown around so casually. It’s like they don’t have the same value to them any more ya know? Like… I want somebody who’s going to say those things to me because they mean them. I want somebody who’s able to look me in the face and just be like ‘I got you baby’. Despite everything, despite the fact I’m a muggle born, despite the war. I want someone who love me for me.” Lily admitted refusing to look at James  as she released her intimate thoughts into the cool night air.

He didn’t say anything for a moment. Then spoke her name softly. She didn’t respond and he shuffled himself closed to her until their shoulders were touching side by side. He said her name softly again, pressing a warm hand to the side of her cheek. She turned her head slightly and looked him in the eye. He looked serious and sincere.

“Lils” He said softly “I’ve got you. Until the very end, no matter what, I’ve got you”

Lily wasn’t sure who leaned in, whether it was her or him was insignificant. What mattered was both their eyes closed and their lips met, soft and tasting like the sharp bite of fire whiskey.


End file.
